ADIOS

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 We are still in New York but about to pack up.we spent almost 4 1/2 months out here. On a week end we decided to go to the Ganapathy temple in Queens area.This Ganapathy temple is following the rituals in Tamil Traditions. The main deity is Maha Ganapathy with a host of 'Upadaivangal'. All the gods you thought of and not thought of are there like the great American Walmart. The only exception is that Tamil gods like Jayalalitha,Khushbu and Rajnikant are not there. After the 'Darshan and Archana we had our brunch in the canteen serving South Indian and North Indian vegetarian dishes. Thus in the weekend we also enjoyed the scent and gorged on Puliothorai,Meduvada,Uttappam and Ney Roasts with copious amounts of Sambar.The only hitch I faced in the temple was when the Poojari asked me my Gothram , while taking the Archana samagri from me.This is an issue I faced in North India too. I used to get away there by saying Nair/Menon or at times Namboodiri for more weightage . The Pandits out there were not too happy to discover the new Gotharas . In Ganesha temple when I was a bit hesitant the Poojari knew that I am Gothramless and proceeded with the usual loud "Mantra Japams "before giving back the samagri as Prasadam.

I told you what happened on my star Birth Day. My date of Birth this year is unique in one way.It is 5-10-2015. It is the same if you read in reverse gear as if it is in Arabic/Urdu .On  this day I lost another tooth. In fact I had to pull it out myself. At times this tooth was troubling me in India also,but I did not get time to show it to a dentist there. It was a bit dicey to spend 5 months with this problem in U.S..The dental problems are not covered in the medical insurance you take in India. One of my friends suggested me to carry the'Adharam' of my house for pledging in an emergency situation of going to a dentist in U.S. But my timely  initiative to pull out the tooth myself resolved many  contemplated hassles. This tooth I buried in the backyard. My earlier wish to plant a fruit bearing tree got scuttled due to the prohibitive costs involved  for the sapling, the cartage in a pick up van and services of an arborist specialised in tree restoration and nutrition. The revealed economics shattered my dreams ( Satya Nash Kar Diya  in Hindi) .I feel instead I should settle for  a fruit bearing perinneal plant. Even if this plan also fall through , consolation is that there is always that  tooth I planted deep in the back yard to commemorate my 69 th  birth day.

 On certain days my grandson,Binay does not get up that easily to get ready for going to school .It is with great difficulty we manage to put him in the school bus on these days.After this accomplishment, the satisfaction  level one gets is same as after a peaceful ' Thozhal' in Guruvayur Temple, with out a crowd pushing,pulling,jostling,groping and scratching before reaching  the  sanctum Santorum .

The timing of the school bus is 8 in the mornings and return by 3 in the afternoons . My equation with the bus driver ( it is a she bus like our she taxis) and the Monitor lady (that is how the supervisor or conductor of the bus is called here) is good.The she bus driver is Ms Maria Valento, a forty something lady with  a big smile.The monitor lady,Ms Georgette ,a Latino ,I presume, is again of similar vintage with a familiar smile and addresses me PAPI. PAPI or PAPI Chulo in Spanish means Father or rather Handsome Daddy. I sense Nalini's glances through the glass windows when the bus comes.   For Puerto Ricans and Dominicans PAPI  means a handy person more intimate and endearing. It is very difficult to understand how the same language have different meanings in neighbouring territories. It is believed that Malayalam evolved from Tamil. But some Tamil words have entirely different connotations in Malayalam and vice versa. Try yourself to say the Malayalam words' To  do' and 'Charal  (Mazha ) Ninnupoi ' in Tamil.

On October 9 we(Nalini and me) had to go to Binay's school for the Special Person's day. His class teacher is Ms Michelle Green.The other teachers were Ms Barbera,Ms Robin, and Ms Sarah .His class mates are Joey, Jack,Sarah,Ben etc. In between we all had a snack break . It was all on the house and Ms Barbara one of the teachers,requested me to have a banana cake made by her. It is really tasty  I complimented Ms Barbara. May be because of this comment she gave Nalini a hug when we bade farewell .On our way back I was wondering about the names they have in this part of the world vis-a-vis our South Indian names with the house name , fathers name and sir names as appendages. One of my army friends had to suffer the ignominy of seeing his father's name dissected exactly in the middle ( RANDU KASHNAM) in print. One half of his father's name was found suffixed to the' Taravad 'or 'Mana' name and the other half prefixed to his name in the Army List. It took considerable time and effort to get  his dear father's name back in one piece in the Army Llist.

The North Indians make spelling mistakes while writing South Indian names.But some people  make spelling mistakes even while talking. I had a colleague of mine in the Austrian firm I was working. I joined this company in 1991 after taking premature retirement from Army. This gentleman could never say a competitor's name correctly as YANTRA SHILPA. It was always YANTRA SHIPLA for him. We also had Mr Sylvan Van Damme , a Belgian ,in this firm who could never call the HR Head as Naresh Yadav .It was always Yaresh Nadav for him . A habit of  Marichu Chollal or Chorichu Mallal of Trivandrum

Out here they have specialised shops for all your needs. Some of them are the Home Depot,stop and shop,container store,whole foods,etc,. We used to visit all these shops not with the idea of buying anything specific but mainly to see the wares on display and to know the latest trends in the U.S. In Yonker's central avenue we  have the 'Royal City Bazar' where you get Indian stuff with emphasis on Kerala items. The hero here is Mr John from Panthalam.His flunkey is Rajan from Todupuzha. Here the prices of items are not marked. Secondly the name of the item does not get reflected in the bill. Hence everything is in the hands of John or Rajan. Like God's hand( courtesy Diego Maradona ). The prices are also variable depending on your mode of transport and your face.' Entha Rajanchetta Sukham Thanne Alley'  an 'Annueshanam' especially by a lady brings down the Horlicks price by two dollars to $4.99.He charged us $ 6.99. At times while billing the quantity four becomes five. My friends used to tell me that in Mumbai the Sindhi shopkeepers cheat a customer three times ( in prices,measurement and while packing). In royal city bazar the possibility of getting taken for a ride at least in price and quantity ,if you are not careful ,is   certain . Hence we can safely sayJohn and Rajan are new Avatar Mallu Sindhi only( 'ULPREKSHA   ALANKARAM' )

"Mattonnin  dharma yogathal   athu   tanallayo  ithu

  ennu  varnyathil  aashanka  ulpreksha ka  alankriti"

( Ennalle  ULPREKSHA ALANKARAM )

I forgot to ask John what John is he? Talking about the name John I am reminded of a story told to me by an honourable person some time back. He was referring to the old British time in India. There was a  British principal of Malabar Christian College in Calicut. The speciality of this gentleman was that he will give admission to a student if he is a Christian . The students of other communities also  get admission if it is denied to them by  other colleges.The student in the story was satisfying both these conditions and  was a sure case . Before giving admission,the following interaction took place.

Princy- So what is your name?

Stu-  John sir

Princy- What John?

Stu-  ( with a Malayali action of shoulders -a sort of shrugging) ' Verrum' John sir.

Princy- What?

Stu-  Verrum John sir.

The principal wrote his name as Verrum John in his records. He became famous as Verrum John. I will ask 'RoyalJohn' what John is he ,when we meet next, even if I lose  a minimum of $20 by cheating .

As I was mentioning earlier,we spend time by viewing TV/CDs. On certain days it is like "Udayastamana  Pooja" with small breaks for food etc. Our culinary trips also continue but mainly on week ends. One thing  we noticed here is that the true Americans weighing more than 20 stones visit  McDonald's . People less than 20 but more than 15 Stones visit Burger King where vegetarian options too are available. The thinner variety of people around 12  stones or less  queue up in front of places like Chipotle where non fattening home grown organic'Cattle Feed ' is available.

My exercise regime still is the same. I have shed nearly eight pounds and Nalini  nine pounds.  The shorts I wear  was very tight around the girth on arrival in U.S. Now it has become loose and remain on the hip on sheer will power like a low waist Levi's of a youngster . In this unstable equilibrium position the other end of the shorts reach below the knees and to an onlooker presents a "THOLASSURAN  LOOK". At times it behaves as if it has a mind of its own. While doing exercises ( I am not supposed to wear a belt while doing Yoga or the Pranayams) when I twist my body to one side the shorts also move In the same direction some distance but not fully and it does not come back to original position when I turn the body back .The shorts but  remain in an 'Ardha Matsyendra Asana Posture' ( a Yogasana -which is lateral spinal twist.) until I bring it back to starting position. Nowadays the aches and pains are everywhere . Once back in India we are thinking of going to the Art Of Living Ashram in Banglore for an Ayurvedic treatment  called "Pancha Karma "  In good old days the " Tharavattil Karanavars" go for a Pizhichil or Uzhichil before a new Sambandam. For me  one itself is adequate .

I was talking to you earlier about the shops here. The name of Bloomingdales is worth special mention. The fifth avenue Bloomingdales is 'the high end shop' like Harrods in London's Oxford Street . A few years back some one had  presented me a tie bought from Bloomingdales.  It appeared a bit outlandish in Apna Delhi. Since It has to be worn out side and not hidden underneath( though ' Koupinam', it was ' Kanda Koupinum) I was a bit hesitant. But in an army party when I wore the tie, it became a hit and a fashion statement ,much appreciated,especially by the lady wives. Out of curiosity  I went to the  fifth avenue Bloomingdales to see the wares on display and when I casually glanced at the prices I was shocked. I realised these places are actually not  for the plebeians like me. 

I suddenly remembered an incident narrated by the same venerable gentleman ,an ICS Veteran. It was war time (  Second World War) and he was on an additional duty of recruitment  for the Army and was sitting with a friend of his. During the course of interviews a prospective candidate came with a recommendation letter for his recruitment.The candidate was given an application form to fill up and told to take help from this friend if required. In between the candidate had a doubt about the possibility of a bomb falling on his head once he joins army.The friend explained to him the intricacies of making a bomb and the prohibitive cost of a bomb .He then asked '  do you think the enemy is a fool to drop such a costly bomb on your head'. No , he was sure that the bomb cost was much more than that of his head.Once you are inside the Bloomingdales of fifth avenue you will get almost the same feelings once you do the cost comparisons of yourself  versus the wares out there. Then the realisation of  your worth in U.S terms dawns on you, let the following lines be a requiem to your unfulfilled desires.  

' Ha sukhangal verum jalam ararivu niyatithan  

  Thrasu  pongunnathum  thane thanupovathum'

( courtesy :-Kumaran Ashan's poem Karuna-a story of a courtesan Vasavadutta and Buddhist monk Upaguptan)

Now the weather is changing  day by day . The nip in the air is increasing.The tree leaves will change into bizarre colours. Different hues are appearing now. Soon it will be a riot of colours. Then the trees shed their leaves revealing the hitherto hidden assets of New York . As if nature  is discarding the 'Abaya' she was wearing till then. At times the snow fall occurs here even in the beginning of November. Hence our decision to move to warmer shores down before the on -set of the snow. This is to avoid getting frozen,a possibility for Nalini who hated winters in  Delhi too. During winter months in Delhi she used to say that' if I am alive in this winter I will definitely go to Kerala in the next winter'. It is time for us to bid farewell to this great land. So let it be in Spanish ,a language spoken by 400 million people of this world and the next widely spoken language out here. Adios or Hasta La Vista  ( Pinne Kanam or ennal  Yatra parayunnillatto) or shall we say Hasta Luego  ( Poyittu  Vegam Varam )  to the U.S of A.

New York

21 October 2015

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American Saga – September 2015

This is a sequel to my August musings. I am writing this from the other side of the Tropic of Cancer--at degrees 43 North and 74 West (New York City--approximately) to be precise. My friends and relatives encouraged me to write sequels to the maiden effort of August. I am presenting again the monthly (If possible) 'Man Ki Batein' (manassil thonniyathum vayil thonniyathum aya assumbandhangal).                                                                              

I am still fascinated by the flora around. Our knowledge about the Flora around have improved from knowing the 'Fern Plants' (Phylum  Pteridophyta ) to identifying few more trees around (result of an Arbo culturist's visit to the premises--same like the Rama Moopan of Kodungallur, the wood cutter nick named Hercules because of his rippling muscles and long loose curly hairs ). Now I can identify a Maple tree, a Crab Apple tree, Japanese Maple tree, one Cryptomeria, one Kwansan Cherry and an Ash tree in our front and rear lawns. As per Ms. Sherry Mendelson, our neighbour the Japanese beauty, planted by the first owners of the house--a Thai Family ,cost them $ 15000. Sherry also requested us to be loving and caring towards this Japanese beauty, one of its kind among a multitude around. On application of my multiplication factor of 65 to this figure I was shell shocked. Since Sherry is a neighbour who has no axe to grind and the fact that generally her race do not lie I believed her. But on looking up the net I found that a small plant could have cost them $ 150 only. Then I realized that Sherry may be the American version of our " Nadan Nunachi Parru". However the revelation about the cost dampened a bit my enthusiastic intent to plant a fruit bearing tree in the lawns on my birthday in October.

Coming back to the fauna around, on close observation we knew that some of the birds frequenting our yard vaguely resembled some of the species in our 'Gods own Country'. Something similar to Jose and Hosey-(Dravidian and Caucasian, but Homosapiens surely) But the birds here may be chirping in English/ Navajo--the Native American tongue.

The things were moving smoothly, till calamity struck one day. On a cleaning day the nameless cleaning lady threw my 'Rajasevak' bottle into the trash. After seeing me panic, Kamala told me to use the bottle containing 'ClearSplash',a cranberry,raspberry flavoured sparkling water beverage. Two such bottles were bought by me thinking they are mineral water bottles. Knowing my insistence for not wasting anything which is paid for, smilingly she suggested me to use the Clear Splash as it is for my morning constitutional. The prospect of having a flavoured ,slightly fragrant, sticky and sweet derriere(Tashreef in Urdu) is a total waste and did not appeal to me. Hence though it pained me, I emptied the contents of the bottle to fill water. Nowadays on cleaning days I keep the bottle out of site of the cleaners (Those Hispanic damsels).

Here as mentioned earlier food is a gourmet delight. At least once a week, we either go to an  eating joint or order from takeaways. The takeaway joints are the Calcutta Wraps at Ardsley or the Mexican joint-Chitpotle. From Calcutta Wraps we can get among the host of other Indian fare the chat, dahiballa, Sandesh, gulabjam, rolls etc. Their piece de resistance, we were told, is the Bengali Macher Jhol, which we are yet to taste. Saugata my son-in-law, though a blue blooded Mahashay or Moshai, he normally prefers things moving on four legs.

From the Mexican Chitpotle, I keep company to Nalini, by ordering vegetarian fare than the non veg Tachos, Burritos or Burrito Bowls. Both me and Nalini settle for Veg Salads with slight changes in the ingredients. Basically it consists of leaves, weeds, grass and some brown rice with sour cream/salsa and pinto beans (our Goan Pinto,Albert Pinto ko gussa Kyom aya genre) It generally looks like cattle feed. Once we start this salad no talking for a considerable period of time. We keep on chewing, chewing and chewing. Nalini chews and throws a smile. This I recommend as an effective panacea to keep a talkative partner (you know what I mean ) silent for a considerable amount of time. I think I should recommend it to my friend S.K. Nair in Chennai who is facing such problems. I normally take more time to eat because of the absence of teeth where required and the denture in the lower front jaw.

The story of the denture is pathetic (Dukh Bhari in Hindi). I lost my first tooth in Indian Military Academy(IMA) during training in year 1969. Here during the Novices Boxing round my opponent, an earlier Avatar (Matsya,Koorma,Varahashcha,Narasimhashcha etc genre) of our own Mary Kom knocked out one tooth from my lower Jaw- that too a frontal one. To get this tooth replaced I needed an injury report from my Alpha  Battalion Adjutant Captain R.S.Bajwa. On approaching this commando course dagger recipient(a real tough nut) he yelled at me “you F..n  shammer” which was followed by a torrent of expletives and a final expletive to get lost. The Kodungallur Bharani songs are more civil and refined in comparison to the expletives of the commando dagger. There ended my pursuit for an injury report. I got this tooth finally fixed during my mid-term break by an outside Dentist. It was a so called permanent fix .I lost that permanently fixed tooth somewhere inside my gut along with some tandoori chicken in a Darjeeling restaurant while having lunch after a few shots of Brandy with hot water. Till such time it was fixed again, during Dental Inspections in Army, I used to point to the Dentist ( 31 up there in the mouth and 1 somewhere down under). Subsequently I lost a few more in time and reached the present condition.

The other eating joints we visit are the Uno Chicago Grill in Yonkers,( where I  normally settle for Fish & Chips ) and 'The cheese cake factory' of The Ridge Hill Mall. In this Cheese Cake Factory, I had a funny experience. Having settled for a Chicken Lettuce wrap with Asian fillings from the small Plates section, I was taken aback when the food arrived. As per the menu the dish consisted of butter lettuce leaves filled with Grilled Chicken and an Asian filling of carrots, bean sprouts, cucumber, cilantro and rice noodles with spicy (!?) cashew sauce. The food was served on a metallic ware of sinusoidall shape having four peaks and three troughs and three wraps served in each trough on tissue papers. I was on the horns of dilemma without knowing where to start and how to start with a sense of deja vu. A similar situation I faced in Meerut in year 1967 where I had gone for Service Selection Board interview. After dinner in an outside restaurant when the waiter brought the finger bowl with a lime piece and hot water (It was winter time-January) I did not know what to do. I will not disclose what I did with that and the reaction of the waiter when he came to clear the bowl lest my daughters and my eldest granddaughter will disown me. The small plate was really small with the ingredients mentioned in the menu appearing in all troughs but not even one gram each in each lettuce leaf. The grilled chicken was like a shrivelled impurity in only two leaves and the rice noodle was three strands one each in the leaves. The main existentialistic issue I faced was how to eat it. Nalini as usual was smiling after seeing the enormous quantity (!) of food and offered me something from her plate. Actually I was not in a mood to accept any generosities. At last making sure by glancing around that nobody is watching including my own flesh and blood sitting opposite and next to me I, using my hands and whatever I could get consumed them in record time including the tissue paper in one of the wraps. This was like the Army lady wife who ate the cardboard base of a salad decoration Nalini made at a Officers Mess function in Nabha, Punjab.

We still are doing the chores explained earlier. But nowadays I can do them in a jiffy ( Bhayiye hath ka Khel in Hindi and Edathu kayyinde Kali in Malayalam). After that it is TV, Movie and weeklies. The 'people' periodical is full of stories on T V and Movie Actors-Sensational scoops,titilating scandals,marriages and divorces after 21 days of marriage and so on. The stories about the Duggar family of T V reality show, about Jennifer Anniston , on the Friend ship of Sandra Bullock and George Clooney, interview details of Anne Hathaway and Robert de Nero, etc are interesting. Another interesting story was of the Kardashians, the fashion line family. Their story of my children, your children and our children is like our own Shoba De's story. But the interesting part in the Kardashian .story is that Bruce Jenner who was married to Kris (earlier Kris Kardashians) is claimed to have two daughters Kylie and Kendal with Kris. Bruce Jenner was married to Kris for 23 years. Now he is Caitlyn Jenner,-a transgender. According to him he felt like a woman for over 65 years. I can see the smile on some faces!! It is a weird world (Anantham,Anjatham,Avarnanieum,e Bhuloka Golam Tiriyunna Margam-Courtesy Nalapat Narayana Menon).

U.S is really a wonderful place with absolute freedom to wear anything you want. I could have stayed here for the intended five months with two or three shorts and a few tees and a woollen sweater or a jacket for October. Here majority of the male and female species including children move around in shorts. The shorts of men and boys are knee length long where as that of the ladies/girls shorts go up and up and the shorts stop going up when they feel shy. In our ' Gods own Country' if the men move around like this people will mistake them for old time municipal/panchayat workers to do menial jobs. But their knee length shorts were khaki in colour.

Here having tempted to do some creative work, I started growing a French beard. Nalini took my photo to send it to her whatsapp friends. It was mainly to show the tee shirt she gave to me as a 'Pirannal' gift on my star birthday after taking money from me. Her friends wanted to see this unique gift for which she did not have to pay. May be to emulate this practice. On seeing this photo, my nine year old eldest granddaughter, hit her forehead in disgust and remarked that “Muthachan should have stayed in India only. Now he does not look like a Nana (maternal grandfather), he looks more like a father now”. What a compliment! On this happy note I bid farewell for now. Will try to reach you all next month.

Appu

27th September 2015